The
massive flood of content that the music industry has seen over the last several
years has really put pressure on many artists to release more and more music.
I’ve experienced some of this pressure, as a few months of being absent from
the Facebook and Twitter newsfeeds leaves me feeling irrelevant and old. I
constantly feel the need to reinvent myself and keep up with the trends without
“selling out” and becoming what some music nerds would consider an industry
puppet.
As
an independent pop artist, I find it impossible to sell out. A close friend
once told me, “Ya went soft on us, man”, and I found that comment to be hilarious.
If you want my “old style”, listen to my old albums; I’m not going to revert
myself back to the sound that I used to have just to make a few people happy. I
enjoy challenging myself and creating a new sound with each body of work that I
complete. I suppose I did “go soft” when I started to have a more radio-pop
sound, but I’m a firm believer in creating the style of music that I personally
like to hear. So, when my tastes change, my music changes, it’s really quite
simple.
As
I started gaining the ears of more listeners, I felt the need to keep up with
today’s industry demands and produce more music as quickly as I could, without
sacrificing quality. The constant need for new music has really helped me
become a better writer, singer and producer, as I always seem to find myself
behind the mic putting together another project. Practice makes perfect, and if
it’s true that it takes ten thousand hours to master your chosen craft, I’m
well on my way.
As
much as I love recording however, I’m beginning to feel as if I’ve worn myself
out. I always told myself that I’d quit if it ever felt like a job, and lately,
it’s starting to feel as if I have to
record something new and fresh or else I face the dreaded box of irrelevancy. I
never want to end up next to Hermy on the island of misfit toys, but if I take
a break from releasing an album every six months, I might just find myself
there. This is an issue I’ve been dealing with for the last several months; I
often wonder if the last album I released will become known as the finale. I
became so caught up in this fast paced world of music that I barely realized it
was happening. I feel as if I’ve said everything that I came here to say, so
maybe it’s time to move onto something new? But then again, I can’t picture my
life without music…
I’ve
always been curious as to how different my life would be if I hadn’t started my
recording career during my senior year of high school. Being involved with
music has given me an outlet to express anything I feel I need to get off of my
chest, but I’ve also known it to keep me trapped in an emotional state that I’d
rather not be in. I found myself incredibly depressed for most of my junior
year at Slippery Rock and recording my feelings didn’t exactly help. After I
would record a new song, I would listen to it on repeat for hours, reliving
every moment that my words described. Obviously, this wasn’t a very healthy way
to live and I can proudly say that I’ve recovered from that year of depression,
but I often think that my recovery time would have been much shorter had I not
been listening to my pain day in and day out.
The world that I placed myself in five years ago has given me much more pain than I expected, but I suppose no one really thinks about the future effects that their hobby could bring when they’re experiencing the high of a lifetime. It’s hard to say what I’ll be doing in a year, but hopefully I’ve figured out how to keep myself away from the basement of depression, even if I have recorded two full albums about it. Keeping up with the life of a pop artist is exhausting and I’m not sure I’ll be doing it much longer, but again, who knows. I always said that I’d never leave without saying goodbye (hint, hint).
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